Pangwodnul is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, generous owl.

Pangwodnul created light four million years ago.

If you believe in Pangwodnul, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Pangwodnul, he will send minions to preach to you.

Pangwodnul's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Pangwodnul's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never wear green ear rings.