Gupwadgemhancatbugdad Jongofwot is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, temperamental wren.

Gupwadgemhancatbugdad Jongofwot created Asia five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gupwadgemhancatbugdad Jongofwot, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Gupwadgemhancatbugdad Jongofwot, she will cry a lot.

Gupwadgemhancatbugdad Jongofwot's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Gupwadgemhancatbugdad Jongofwot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Hide from cyan otters for they are unholy.

3. Never talk about eagles.

4. Never jump in the presence of mites.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.