Ganbidwip is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, selfish yak.

Ganbidwip created dark energy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ganbidwip, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Ganbidwip, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Ganbidwip's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Ganbidwip's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never wear orange scarves on sacred days.

3. Never adorn your head with red markings.

4. Never feed nuts to whales while wearing yellow kilts.

5. Always pray immersed in water.