Laghamsan is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, ill-tempered fish.

Laghamsan created the planet Earth four billion years ago.

If you believe in Laghamsan, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Laghamsan, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Laghamsan's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Laghamsan's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not hurt gulls.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.