Figmetfot is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, staggering toad.

Figmetfot created the Whirlpool Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Figmetfot, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Figmetfot, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Figmetfot's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Figmetfot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your arms.

2. Do not wear gold on your body.

3. Never wear purple shoes on sacred days.

4. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.

5. Run away from gray rats, for they are unholy.