Duddubsab Dumtingep Satfomcar is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, contented shark.

Duddubsab Dumtingep Satfomcar created the Milkyway four billion years ago.

If you believe in Duddubsab Dumtingep Satfomcar, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Duddubsab Dumtingep Satfomcar, she will turn you into a hamster.

Duddubsab Dumtingep Satfomcar's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Duddubsab Dumtingep Satfomcar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Hide from orange shrews for they are unholy.

4. Never feed bananas to sheep while wearing cyan shorts.

5. Learn three new languages a year.