Fobbasthud is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, proud gnu.

Fobbasthud created a bottom quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fobbasthud, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fobbasthud, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Fobbasthud's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Fobbasthud's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fobbasthud.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always help mites.

5. Never write about eukaryotes.