Hasfligjen is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, contented turtle.

Hasfligjen created viruses three million years ago.

If you believe in Hasfligjen, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Hasfligjen, she will turn you into a puffin.

Hasfligjen's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Hasfligjen's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about special relativity.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never remain bowed at midnight.

5. Do not chop down trees.