Nanvil is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, humorless gorilla.

Nanvil created a bottom quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nanvil, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Nanvil, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Nanvil's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Nanvil's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never feed corn to turtles while wearing white coats.

4. Sharks are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Nanvil in the centre of the settlement.