Jonfarndib is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, uncaring fairy.

Jonfarndib created the Sun three million years ago.

If you believe in Jonfarndib, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Jonfarndib, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Jonfarndib's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Jonfarndib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about aubergines.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. You must pray to Jonfarndib nine times a day.

4. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.