Kipfunsit is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, quiet eagle.

Kipfunsit created life six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kipfunsit, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kipfunsit, he will turn you into a tree.

Kipfunsit's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Kipfunsit's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at planets.

2. Feed all hungry geese.

3. Do not place lemons upon stone.

4. Never approach rivers carrying clay.

5. Never feed limes to ants while wearing stockings.