Lenfosswik is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, ruthless finch.

Lenfosswik created the planet Jupiter eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lenfosswik, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Lenfosswik, she will turn you into a mole.

Lenfosswik's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Lenfosswik's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never talk about thermodynamics near turtles while wearing turquoise tights and balancing three platinum spheres on your chest.

3. Do not take Lenfosswik's name in vain.

4. Never go into orange rooms.

5. Never hurt shrews.