Cepcanrutt is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, pitiless crab.

Cepcanrutt created the Cigar Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cepcanrutt, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cepcanrutt, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Cepcanrutt's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Cepcanrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Remain standing during prayer.

2. Never travel toward the west during summer.

3. Never think about quantum gravity.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Run away from white monkeys, for they are unholy.