Jinbestbarn is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, temperamental crane.

Jinbestbarn created the planet Venus eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jinbestbarn, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jinbestbarn, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Jinbestbarn's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Jinbestbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair fawn.

2. Hide if nine grasshopers approach from the east.

3. Do not wear purple clothing.

4. Always store gooseberries above ground.

5. Never speak at midnight.