Santargbifnurtgomdum is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, unthoughtful faun.

Santargbifnurtgomdum created the Andromeda Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Santargbifnurtgomdum, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Santargbifnurtgomdum, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Santargbifnurtgomdum's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Santargbifnurtgomdum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Always help sick dolphins.

3. Do not bounce in public.

4. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Run away if seven birds approach from the north.