Bosshamtar is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, dishonest giraffe.

Bosshamtar created a quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bosshamtar, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bosshamtar, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Bosshamtar's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Bosshamtar's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near bats while wearing blue hats and balancing five platinum spheres on your back.

3. Erect a giant red sculpture of Bosshamtar in the centre of the settlement.

4. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Hide if six hamsters approach from the west.