Tadtettiflag is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, tranquil zebra.

Tadtettiflag created bats five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tadtettiflag, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Tadtettiflag, she will cry a lot.

Tadtettiflag's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Tadtettiflag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about special relativity.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Tadtettiflag.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not dye your hair violet.

5. Pray towards the south.