Jamtigfatlibflamtettihiv is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, staggering spider.

Jamtigfatlibflamtettihiv created a top quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jamtigfatlibflamtettihiv, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Jamtigfatlibflamtettihiv, it will turn you into a frog.

Jamtigfatlibflamtettihiv's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Jamtigfatlibflamtettihiv's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not shave your head.

3. Do not kill tapirs.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.
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