Zeddumgad is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, all-knowing shrew.

Zeddumgad created dark energy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zeddumgad, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Zeddumgad, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Zeddumgad's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Zeddumgad's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force near badgers while wearing yellow shorts and balancing three lead spheres on your head.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Zeddumgad.

4. Do not hop at crossroads.

5. Do not wear stockings marked with black.