Botstafflag is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, happy hamster.

Botstafflag created gold four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Botstafflag, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Botstafflag, she will remove you from existence.

Botstafflag's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Botstafflag's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse oil with water.

2. Learn nine new languages a year.

3. Botstafflag must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never gather six doves in one place.

5. Never remain standing at dusk.