Flabpigfat is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, amazing crocodile.

Flabpigfat created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Flabpigfat, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Flabpigfat, he will think nothing of it.

Flabpigfat's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Flabpigfat's Holy Commandments

1. Always help snails.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.

4. Never think about dark energy near hamsters while wearing pink shoes and balancing seven copper spheres on your arms.

5. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.