Bastdisswab Foss is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, dishonest giraffe.

Bastdisswab Foss created the universe eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastdisswab Foss, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bastdisswab Foss, she will turn you into a goat.

Bastdisswab Foss' most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Bastdisswab Foss' Holy Commandments

1. Hide from blue ducks for they are unholy.

2. Bastdisswab Foss must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never leap in the presence of tapirs.

4. Do not take Bastdisswab Foss' name in vain.

5. Never paint your feet pink.