Teenkenrill Butortjig is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, moody shark.

Teenkenrill Butortjig created an electron twelve years ago.

If you believe in Teenkenrill Butortjig, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Teenkenrill Butortjig, she will destroy your home planet.

Teenkenrill Butortjig's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Teenkenrill Butortjig's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never talk about quantum mechanics.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never write about spacetime.