Gattofgut is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unsympathetic duck.

Gattofgut created water four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gattofgut, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gattofgut, he will turn you into a plant.

Gattofgut's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Gattofgut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear ear rings marked with pink.

2. Do not gather at walls at dawn.

3. Do not speak of solid mechanics near sacred fires.

4. Never wear gray tights on sacred days.

5. Gattofgut loves badgers, so they must be honoured.