Bestkipnig Nigflamlag Pingabsom is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, witless fly.

Bestkipnig Nigflamlag Pingabsom created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bestkipnig Nigflamlag Pingabsom, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bestkipnig Nigflamlag Pingabsom, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Bestkipnig Nigflamlag Pingabsom's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Bestkipnig Nigflamlag Pingabsom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your feet.

2. Never talk about black holes.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Pigs are not to be trusted.