Fossgepbappasarf Pibtomripyik is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, annoying human.

Fossgepbappasarf Pibtomripyik created the Cigar Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Fossgepbappasarf Pibtomripyik, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Fossgepbappasarf Pibtomripyik, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Fossgepbappasarf Pibtomripyik's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Fossgepbappasarf Pibtomripyik's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Fossgepbappasarf Pibtomripyik.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not hurt geese.

4. Never hop in the presence of doves.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.