Tinruttmad Nabcepmifmob is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, duplicitous penguin.

Tinruttmad Nabcepmifmob created energy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tinruttmad Nabcepmifmob, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tinruttmad Nabcepmifmob, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Tinruttmad Nabcepmifmob's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Tinruttmad Nabcepmifmob's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Never mention turtles.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a room before entering it.

5. Erect four aluminium sculptures of Tinruttmad Nabcepmifmob on top of important buildings.