Vabvidhamboss Davdotboss Quartarffly is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, omniscient goat.

Vabvidhamboss Davdotboss Quartarffly created light five billion years ago.

If you believe in Vabvidhamboss Davdotboss Quartarffly, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Vabvidhamboss Davdotboss Quartarffly, she will come to you in dreams.

Vabvidhamboss Davdotboss Quartarffly's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Vabvidhamboss Davdotboss Quartarffly's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never feed lots of aubergines to eagles while wearing black ear rings.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always make sure there are no gulls in a building before entering it.

5. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.