Volnegpark is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, omniscient bear.

Volnegpark created water seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Volnegpark, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Volnegpark, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Volnegpark's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Volnegpark's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Volnegpark.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Volnegpark.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Volnegpark.

4. Never think ill of sick manatees.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.