Gigcebben is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, almighty aardvark.

Gigcebben created viruses three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gigcebben, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gigcebben, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Gigcebben's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Gigcebben's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large copper sculpture of Gigcebben on top of all buildings.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always help sick squirrels.

4. Do not jump in public.

5. Do not hurt great tits.