Dogkabfen is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, cheerful spider.

Dogkabfen created the Tadpole Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dogkabfen, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Dogkabfen, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Dogkabfen's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Dogkabfen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dogkabfen.

3. Never feed lots of oranges to eagles while wearing green ear rings.

4. Always make sure there are no mice in a room before entering it.

5. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.