Bissbegladmeg is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, selfish wolf.

Bissbegladmeg created a down quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Bissbegladmeg, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bissbegladmeg, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Bissbegladmeg's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Bissbegladmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never hurt birds.