Fomcapgon is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, astonishing ant.

Fomcapgon created viruses three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fomcapgon, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Fomcapgon, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Fomcapgon's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Fomcapgon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Fomcapgon must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Retreat if three horses approach from the west.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.