Gamcunbaf is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, unselfish cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Gamcunbaf created carbon six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gamcunbaf, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gamcunbaf, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Gamcunbaf's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Gamcunbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not jump in public.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never think about planets.