Cissxuckquim is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, all-powerful centaur.

Cissxuckquim created dark energy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cissxuckquim, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Cissxuckquim, she will think nothing of it.

Cissxuckquim's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Cissxuckquim's Holy Commandments

1. Always share lentils with strangers, but never with ducks.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Cissxuckquim loves tapirs, so they must be respected.

4. Never think about bacteria.

5. Do not consume onions at dawn.