Pangstik is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, staggering bear.

Pangstik created a quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pangstik, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Pangstik, it will turn you into a snail.

Pangstik's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Pangstik's Holy Commandments

1. Rats are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Pangstik.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Pangstik loves great tits, so they must be respected.

5. Never feed melons to squirrels while wearing indigo dresses.