Cumtunvin is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, all-powerful gnu.

Cumtunvin created the Virgo Supercluster two million years ago.

If you believe in Cumtunvin, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Cumtunvin, it will turn you into a tree.

Cumtunvin's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Cumtunvin's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Cumtunvin eight times a day.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never eat gooseberries.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not shave your neck.