Gepjincid is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, strong lizard.

Gepjincid created dark matter four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepjincid, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gepjincid, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Gepjincid's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Gepjincid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Hide if seven ducks approach from the north.

4. Retreat if five mice approach from the west.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.