Lincep is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, flying walrus.

Lincep created life four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lincep, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Lincep, she will boil you in a big pot.

Lincep's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Lincep's Holy Commandments

1. Mites are not to be trusted.

2. Never write about ultrasonics.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Lincep.

4. Do not hurt otters.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.