Arfhigkemfar is a god.

He takes the form of a small, almighty bear.

Arfhigkemfar created an atom five billion years ago.

If you believe in Arfhigkemfar, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Arfhigkemfar, he will turn you into a plant.

Arfhigkemfar's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Arfhigkemfar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not take Arfhigkemfar's name in vain.

3. Do not contemplate gravity during the night.

4. Retreat if eight mice approach from the south.

5. Always remove shoes before touching titanium.