Kinbesthas is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, proud gerbil.

Kinbesthas created tapeworms seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Kinbesthas, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Kinbesthas, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Kinbesthas' most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Kinbesthas' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum mechanics near swans while wearing black tights and balancing three gold spheres on your neck.

2. Run away from green monkeys, for they are unholy.

3. Never think about spacetime.

4. Erect a giant red sculpture of Kinbesthas in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not eat beans.