Nelbegbag is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, boastful horse.

Nelbegbag created dark energy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nelbegbag, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Nelbegbag, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Nelbegbag's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Nelbegbag's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nelbegbag.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

3. Do not speak about pineapples.

4. Do not hurt rats.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.