Sabkonwab is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, awe-inspiring bear.

Sabkonwab created the Cigar Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Sabkonwab, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Sabkonwab, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Sabkonwab's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Sabkonwab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum gravity near foxes while wearing mauve scarves and balancing three lead spheres on your face.

2. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

3. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Sabkonwab in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never hurt squirrels.

5. Always help snakes in need.