Nillhapyak is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, stupid lizard.

Nillhapyak created everything that exists five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nillhapyak, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Nillhapyak, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Nillhapyak's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Nillhapyak's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Worship no other gods but Nillhapyak.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always take life seriously.
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