Lensawtarg is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, all-powerful scorpion.

Lensawtarg created a down quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lensawtarg, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Lensawtarg, she will come to you in dreams.

Lensawtarg's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Lensawtarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never think ill of sick manatees.

5. Always obey Lensawtarg's priests.