Nulrilfen is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, all-powerful faun.

Nulrilfen created tapeworms five million years ago.

If you believe in Nulrilfen, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nulrilfen, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Nulrilfen's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Nulrilfen's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat peas.

2. Never mention goats.

3. Hide if six rats approach from the south.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate snakes.

5. Never think ill of sick squirrels.