Staftaffod is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, clever warg.

Staftaffod created parasitic wasps four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Staftaffod, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Staftaffod, she will turn you into a goat.

Staftaffod's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Staftaffod's Holy Commandments

1. Put Staftaffod first in all things.

2. Never eat oranges.

3. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not stand on grass.