Ragcinbell is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, idiotic giraffe.

Ragcinbell created the Andromeda Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ragcinbell, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Ragcinbell, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Ragcinbell's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Ragcinbell's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from cyan goats for they are unholy.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not wear nickel on your body.

5. Always take life seriously.