Loopwapab is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, omniscient jaguar.

Loopwapab created a strange quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Loopwapab, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Loopwapab, it will torture you forever.

Loopwapab's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Loopwapab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear violet clothing.

2. Always share corn with strangers, but never with ducks.

3. Do not travel during winter.

4. Always act with humility when addressing priests.

5. Never talk about shrews.