Yarl is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, dishonest lion.

Yarl created a strange quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Yarl, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yarl, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Yarl's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Yarl's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never hop in the presence of tortoises.